Slightly... Disturbing

This post originally "aired" on September 23, 2011.

We learned, last January, when we began our adventure into sharing our random thoughts, we can (kind of) see how peeps find our website. We can’t see individual email addresses, if you’ve ever wondered about that. (Did we just hear BIG sighs of relief—from all over the World? Tee Hee Hee.)

We get “Stats.” One of them shows “countries” that have visited our site. Well, technically, of course, people in that country. In the past eight months, we’ve had visitors from (this is only a partial list): England, Singapore, Germany, France, Australia, Canada, Scotland, South Africa, India, Sweden, The Netherlands, Hong Kong, Brazil, Greece, Mexico, Peru, Spain, The Dominican Republic, Denmark, Morocco, and Italy. Quite exciting for Little Ol’ Texan Gals. We heart our “visitors!”

We also receive "Stats" on Referring URLs (BTW: ELC thinks of an urologist every single last time she sees these initials. She has no earthly idea what URLs are, but surely they could have found a better acronym.) and Referring Sites. Once again: ELC = Clueless. TLC might have lost her patience, once or twice, while attempting to explain both of these technological-lingo-thingys to her. “Mom, please forget it. It doesn’t matter. You don’t need to know what these are, okay?” Yep. You’re right, TLC. It truly doesn’t matter.

The tres most interesting “Stats” we see are those that show what individuals Google in order to arrive at our website. OOG. (Oh Our Gosh.)

Some of the queries make perfect sense. Like, for example, when ELC posted a couple of beautiful songs she adores. We noticed lots of queries on those particular songwriters—or other songs they’ve penned (see American Poets). We try to imagine how confused those (probably serious) individuals must have been when they ended up at lolwiththeleightons. And, we can’t lie: it brings a smile to our faces. Bless their hearts.

Other queries are interesting and make a little sense to us—based on past posts. But then there are those that, although they do make a teeny bit of sense, are slightly disturbing.

A few have made absolutely, positively, unequivocally, NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. We pinky-swear, on ELC’s great-grandmother’s rocking chair and TLC’s Hubby’s hand-crafted coffee table, we are not, we repeat, not, NOT, NOT making any of this up. We couldn’t if we tried. We’re typing them exactly as they’re shown in our “Stats.” (These are only a few of the recent queries. We realize now we should have kept track of the many we’ve received since the inception of our website. Just for the giggle value!)

Queries that make sense (to us, anyway!):

greek yogurt diet (We’ve gotten oodles and oodles of variations of this phrase—including Dukan Diet, yogurt diet, non-fat yogurt diet, etc., etc., etc. You get the picture. See Our Big Nonfat Greek Yogurt Diet. This might be what Dr. Dukan will say, if he ever personally visits our website: “Oh, mon Dieu! Qui sant ces dames folles Texas?” For those of you not fluent in French, as is ELC—see Philosophie Refrigerteur—Deuxieme Partie, we'll give you a hint: one of those words means cRaZy.)

makeup shirt

red bottom shoes Oprah

humorous cocktail napkins women

prince william and princess katherine

“with a scoop of blue bell”

october issue of o magazine breast cancer tee at no (Wait, what? “at no” ??? What is that? Could possibly drive ELC over the edge.)

Queries that make a little sense:

paula’s volcano cake

karen hillard good

teddy bear with eyes close together

reese brownie mix from Costco

www.lol_kizz

Queries that make no sense whatsoever:

“full leg cast”

hand made home utilities

(We are rendered speechless. Except to say: Hhhuuuuhhhhh?)

SCARIEST QUERY TO DATE:

nude Indian leg wrestling

If you happen to be the person who Googled the last one (and, please, Lord, let there be only one), trust us, we do not want to know why, although we might have laughed when we read it. Yes, we understand the Indian leg wrestling (see Kiss My Sparkly, Taboo And Feisty Tiara). We still experienced a few (icky) shivers.

We’ll always embrace curiosity. ALWAYS. (TLC Wikis or Googles something at least ten times a day.) As Charlene once said (on Designing Women—the Foreign Affairs episode), when Mary Jo asked her why she knew all of the capitals of the world:

“Because I love knowledge. In fact, I yearn for it.”

Thanks to everyone who ended up looking at our website because of curiosity or a yearning for knowledge (or the need to find a recipe or have information for some kind of research paper or because you are interested in hand made home utilities). Hopefully, you’re still around—LOLing with us!

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UPDATE:

Since that date, we’ve had many, many, MANY other innerstin’ search words and phrases. Some that kind of make sense (although we still can’t figure out how they reach lolwiththeleightons), like (and, remember, we’re typing these EXACTLY as how they’re shown—caps, no caps, etc.):

the greek yogurt diet

gift idea for a college girl (We’ve got a million of those, but not sure where we might have specifically discussed that topic.)

the nanny starring fran drescher

old owl mug

pretty eyes (Of course all three of us have those! Well, okay, Little Leighton does, for sure.)

bernice clifton pictures

how to wash james avery polishing cloth (We don’t know, exactly, how you do this, but we’d love for someone to tell us, please.)

charlie brown snowman

duda daze (Tons o’ these...)

thank you duda daze (YES—ABSOLUTELY—THANK YOU!!! We heart you, still...)

And then there are those questionable/weird/cRaZy searches (Promise—we’re not judging—only commenting):

Shmushtick (Right.)

schmoogle patootie (We didn’t know we’d ever referenced this little cutesie name we both call our hubbies...NOT.)

Shhh Mavs (Huh?)

guacomole greek yogurt adobe (Wwwhhhhaaaaatttttt?)

pea to my pod teddy (We don’t even know where to begin...)

their peas my pod (Your query. Sheesh.)

big ol pregnant (TOO FUNNY. Of course, we do sorta get this. TLC was certainly that for quite awhile. But...?)

i prefer cracked brownies (Let’s be honest: We prefer ANY brownies.)

LOL (Does make some sense, right?)

And...our favourite...hands down...

do baby bobcats coo (We have no idea. Even though ELC does live in the sticks and there are MANY bobcats, she’s never been that close to hear what would have to be positively precious.)

If you’re reading this now, and you put in any of those queries, we feel compelled to share the following statements of fact:

We don’t know how or why you reached us, but WELCOME to lolwiththeleightons! (Hope you weren’t too terribly disappointed...and that you’ll stay with us forever!)